Please, Thank You, & Two Way Streets

It’s getting to be that time of year again where summer gatherings are in full swing. This is also the time of year that huge life events take place and invitations start pouring in for celebrations. I like parties, family gatherings, and almost always attend any event that I am invited to. Yet, I was thinking the other day that last summer I went to a wedding, college graduation, and a baby shower, all of which I gave very nice monetary gifts. Do you know how many "Thank You" notes I received? None! I find this very rude and offensive! I feel that if you have time to send out invitations, then you have time to send a quick thank you as well. This really irks me too on the invites that I feel I received just because I would be another gift giver. You know what I am talking about. Those people you never hear from until they have a party where gift giving is the norm. The college graduate did post an informal "Thanks to all who attended my graduation" on his Facebook wall. I don't want to be collectively grouped into a tacky Facebook shout out when I took time out of my day to attend your event and gave a nice gift. It doesn't have to be hand written either. With all the technology out there to reach people today, I think it would be ok to send a quick text, email, or even a Facebook message acknowledging the gift and saying thanks. It doesn't matter how it's delivered, just make it personal. I know there are those who say they don't gift give for a thank you. I guess I feel differently. If I give you a gift, I expect a thank you. It’s good manners. If you can't find the time to say thank you, I will not be finding the time to attend any more of your future events.


I have also had people expect me to do for them without a polite request. I had one person say, "There is a family at my church that is struggling. I'm going to need all the clothes your girls have out grown." And since I am a sahm, "I need you to watch my kids on xxx day." Look, I love helping people, but please ask, don't demand.


Also, my mom and I were discussing how we have attended every event of a certain family member for the past few years, yet she has not been to one of ours. Functions and communication are two way streets. I like to feel like I am a valued part of someone’s life, so when it starts feeling a little one sided, it’s time for me to move on. If relationships are important to you, you need to learn to give as well as take. 

If you are sending out invitations for any life events this year, do remember that a little please or thank you will go a long way!

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8 Year Olds & Phone Etiquitte?

My 8 year old has a new found love of the telephone. These past few days I have been thinking that we need to round up all the 8 year old phone users and teach them proper phone etiquette.

The phone has been ringing way too early on the weekends. When I answer, I get, “Who is this?” What ever happened to “Hello, may I speak with xxx?”

When I send the neighborhood kids home because we need to start getting ready for bed, the phone rings not even 5 minutes later. It doesn’t matter that they have just spent all day here, or they heard me tell the girls it’s bedtime. They still call.

Oh, my child is not a perfect phone user either. She was speaking with her friend the other day. I said “Allison, wrap up your call. We are getting ready to eat.” *Click* Just like that, she hangs up on her friend. No goodbye, no nothing! “Did you just hang up on your friend?” “Yes. You told me to get off the phone.” Now, I don’t talk on the phone a lot, but I am pretty sure she has heard me say good bye every time I end a call.

The real kicker. A boy from her class called while she was out. When she returned home, I told her she could return the call. She puts on her plastic high heel play shoes and took the phone out on the deck. Um, he can’t see you and your fancy shoes, and excuse me, but you are 8. There is no such thing as a private phone call in this house at your age.

While I have never been a big fan of the phone, I am really not enjoying it here much lately.

Are your kids big phone talkers? What age did they start making their own calls? What limitations do you set on phone use in your house?

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