We bought our first home a little over 3 years ago. Up until then we lived in an apartment, so decorating for Christmas was limited to a few strands of lights, a couple of bows, and a sprinkling of tinsel. Had I known that homeownership turns a perfectly sane man into a competitive lunatic at Christmastime, I would have seriously considered staying in that apartment. Yes, I’ve seen those holiday movies- National Lampoons Christmas Vacation, Deck the Halls, and so on where the men are crack head addict crazy when it comes to their light displays. Unfortunately, there is truth to those comedies, and my husband is turning out to be just as nuts as they are. The sad part about it, it’s not just my husband either. This is a recent conversation I overheard between my husband and a coworker:
Jason- “I just got done putting up 4000 lights.”
Ben- “Yeah, I’m putting up 5000 this weekend.”
Jason- “Really? Good luck with that, it took me forever to get mine up.”
Then Jason calls me on his way home from work. “l’m going to be a little late. I’m stopping at Home Depot to get a few more lights on the way home.”
How can 2 men (who don’t even live in the same neighborhood!) turn something as joyous as holiday decorating into a pissing match? I would let this bother me, but we do get a lot of compliments from the neighbors. One asked when we were planning on putting ours up so the rest of the neighborhood could be put to shame and another even sent us this photo and said they were doing the same on their house this year:
Another told us last year she had a visitor from Pakistan and when they turned down our street she started clapping and squealing with delight. She had never seen Christmas lights before and we really made her day. My husband only uses LED lights, so it is massively bright, and at times, I feel a little embarrassed at our “Looky Me! Looky Me!” house. But, it makes him happy, it seems to make the neighbors happy, and it really makes the kids happy (as well as the electric company), so I’ll just silently mumble under my breath from now on when I get at least one more phone call this year telling me to start dinner a little late because we need more lights. And pray home depot loses my husbands email next year when they start advertising they've got lights in stock. Wish this pic did the brightness justice, but you get the idea.

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